Because This is My First Life: KDrama Review

The Gist: When assistant drama writer Ji-ho (Jung So-min) quits her job after being sexually harassed and has to move out due to her brother's recent marriage, she's desperate for somewhere to stay. When mutual friends score her a great deal living with Se-hee (Lee Min-ki), she leaps at the chance, unaware that Se-hee is male. When they both realize the mistake, they are already comfortable living together. In classic drama logic, the fix to both their problems is simple: a two-year contract marriage. Naturally, it's hard to keep feelings out of it when you're living together for the first time. Ji-ho's best friends have their own issues. Marriage-desperate Ho-rang (Kim Ga-eun) can't seem to get her clueless boyfriend Won-seok (Kim Min-seok) to propose. Serial dater Soo-ji (Esom) can't seem to shake the friendly CEO Sang-goo (Park Byung-eun).

This is a good show, but it just wasn't the show I wanted it to be. I picked this show because I wanted something light and heart-warming. While it has the benefits of sweet romance, it is definitely a more melancholy show than I was expecting. I appreciate the show's frankness about the harassment of women. Ji-ho faces it through working with her director and her co-workers try to wipe the harassment under the rug and assure her that it's not a big deal. Ji-ho stands up for herself, but in a realistic sacrifice, she has to give up working on her project to do so. Soo-ji constantly faces unwanted advances from her co-workers, but has to put on a smile to keep her job and keep her reputation. Even though they're in the wrong, she's the one who will be judged if she kicks up a fuss. Even the younger cafe co-worker Bok-nam (Kim Min-kyu) is a harasser. He doesn't back off when Ji-ho says she's married and uninterested. I appreciate that Se-hee wrecks his motorcycle. Even though it was a "misunderstanding," him being young and hot doesn't excuse his behavior. It's not OK to comment on a woman's looks or touch her when you work with her.

This show spends a long time examining marriage as an institution an it is often fairly bleak in its portrayal. Still, I appreciate how deftly this show handles Se-hee. Se-hee is initially shown as inept at love, maybe even a little high-functioning autistic in his life skills. Yet, we realize as viewers that we are assuming a lot about Se-hee. Just because Ji-ho is inexperienced, we assume that Se-hee's behavior is due to his own inexperience. Yet, there is a neat twist in the last 2/3 of the show, where we realize that Se-hee is not inexperienced, but is unwanting. His behavior is meant to push people away and build walls. He has experienced and is dealing with his own pain. He knows what it means to be in love and hasn't fully processed his own experience enough to open himself up to more pain. While he is not overly smart with social cues, he is drawing boundaries to protect himself from what he doesn't think he deserves.

I also appreciate the care that is put into Ho-rang's relationship. Their relationship is not healthy by any means throughout most of the show. Their goals are not aligned and they can't communicate clearly. I was worried this show would just patch them up and push them together and I admire the bravery to break them up. It's short-term pain but for the good of both of them. By the time they get back together, they've had a chance to examine their feelings and their goals.

 Likewise, Soo-ji seems flippant, but like with Se-hee, you realize that her careful walls are built to avoid further pain. I appreciate Song-goo's willingness to accommodate the way Soo-ji is and why she's wary. Her ability to break down her walls with him are hard-earned.

My shining star is Bo-mi (Yoon Bo-Mi), who's the only female working at the Don't Marry, Date App. I appreciate that even though she fits in with the boys, she insists on wearing frilly, pink outfits. I also appreciate how much Se-hee and Bo-mi are alike and understand each other. Even though she's understated, she can let loose and party with the best of them. Bo-mi is my hero.

I have serious issues with the end of this show. So, Hi-Ho asks for a divorce. Even though she loves Se-hee. For... reasons? As far as I can tell, she just wanted to break him down completely so that he'll be honest with her and to me it just seemed... cruel. I get it if she wanted to travel and such, but she said she wanted to make love her priority, but rather than just talking to Se-hee like an adult about his past, she tortures him and makes him think she doesn't want him. Especially when she knows that he's going to confess and has real feelings for her. This just felt like such a drama move. Why have a conversation when you can have a dramatic divorce? This is just compounded by the fact that they end up registering their marriage anyway. Don't get me wrong, they needed to work some stuff out. But I think it would have been better to just talk like normal people rather than going through some huge "break-up." No bueno.

Final Grade: B-